I will never have my first Boston finish.
We are left a half mile from the finish line. If only I could keep running, keep time moving and not stopping for any of us. To preserve this day as a monument of the glory, of the joy and happiness and celebration of life. In my mind I am never stopped. Until the tears come and the pain I feel for all of it.
All of it.
Here after time passing I have never felt remorse of not crossing the finish line. Many handle the tragedy differently, some later running the final mile for closure, others demanding to return to finish. For me I do not have those desires. I do not need nor want it.
It will not bring Krystle, Martin or Lu back to us.
It will not give Sean Collier another sunrise.
What I do feel is to come back, come back strong, run this race and remember it all. All of it. And when we cross that finish line in 2014 it will be enough. To be there. In the presence of these angels and those who survived to come back to us.
And when a child extends their hand to me along the course, I will extend my hand in return.
It will be.
Like no other.
*** *** *** ***
Unleash the pain
flee the suffering
escape this place
of broken hearts
leave these things to us
rise to where
you must go
we take these things from you, for you
our gift is
fly angels fly